Paul Zimmerman / Getty. Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed
What’s the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
Stretch.
When you walk into a bar, what do you typically order?
Bourbon on the rocks. Bulleit if they got it.
What's the one word you are guilty of using too often?
Annoying.
What is the last thing you searched for on Google?
The proper spelling of Bulleit bourbon.
Who is the last person that called or texted you?
My wife.
What's the wallpaper on your phone and/or computer?
My kids on both.
What was the last awkward situation you were in and how did you handle it?
While getting on the subway, my backpack accidentally bumped the back of a woman who was standing in the entrance (and not making room, btw). She went OFF on me, and as I apologized, it quickly became clear she was quite literally insane, as she repeatedly compared being bumped into with molestation and incest, asking me who in my life molested me that I would think it was okay to bump into her like that, asking how much money I had in my backpack, and that she would have to have a dog follow me. I moved to the other end of the train, and thankfully she did not follow me.
What is your TV guilty pleasure?
AFV, the funniest show in television.
Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed
What's the first CD you bought?
This is mortifying, but The Spin Doctors. I'd love to say this was when I was very young and didn't know any better, but I was in college. I could have just lied, but the truth will set you free. I'm not sure how the truth will set me free in this case, but perhaps I'll figure it out one day.
And what music are you currently listening to?
Recent purchases are The Julie Ruin and Thee Oh Sees. I guess that balances out The Spin Doctors, but not really. No offense, anyone from The Spin Doctors.
What is the one food you cannot resist?
A burrito.
What movie makes you laugh the most?
I love Local Hero.
What toppings do you like on your pizza?
Fresh kalamata olives. Onions. Green pepper. Not necessarily all on one pizza. Doesn't sound like a bad combo, though.
What drives you absolutely crazy?
People who don't pick up their dog's shit. Annoying dog owners in general, and I was a dog owner. You can read about what a great dog owner I was here.
What was your first online screen name?
I do not know. It's not that I don't know the answer, the answer is "I do not know." That is not the answer. I really do not know.
Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed
What’s the last thing you copied & pasted on your phone?
This headline from the Detroit Free Press website, sent today to my friend Ted: "Woman: Celebrity gave me genital herpes in Royal Oak."
What’s your favorite curse word?
Fuck.
What's your favorite emoji?
I have never used it once, but I'll say the burrito. Is that an emoji?
Pick one: Kittens or puppies?
Puppies.
New York or Los Angeles?
New York.
Twitter or Instagram?
I just joined Instagram and have yet to use it, but I'm not on Twitter, so I guess I'll say Instagram.
Bacon or Nutella?
Nutella.
Britney or Christina?
Christina. I am not ashamed to say I have "Ain't No Other Man" on my iPod.
Coffee or tea?
Tea.
NSYNC or BSB?
Pass.
2am or 2pm?
2PM.
Beyonce or Rihanna?
Tie.
Netflix and chill or just Netflix?
I'd say the chill is always implied when you Netflix.
Hannah Montana or Lizzie McGuire?
I don't feel like googling who Lizzie McGuire is, so I'll just say HM.
And finally: tell us a secret.
I intentionally shit my pants once.
Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed
Jon's new miniseries Neon Joe, Werewolf Hunter premieres tonight, December 7th, on Adult Swim at midnight and will air at the same time slot all week.